Pregnancy from the Eyes of a Single Mama

January 24, 2012 in baby, pregnancy with 9 Comments

This post was written by my sister, Rebekah. It was originally published in August 2010. Since Sanctity of Human Life Sunday was this 2 days ago, I thought this was fitting to share! It’s a beautiful story of God’s forgiveness, grace and love. Not every woman is thrilled to learn it’s positive when they take a pregnancy test but each one of those babies are blessings!

Rebekah and 3-day-old Emerson

I was 19 when I found out I was pregnant.  I had just started my sophomore year in college and it was a nightmare.  Not only was I pregnant, but I was not in a relationship with the baby’s father; this was not exactly an ideal situation.  I was so scared about what my parents and friends would think and say.  I think I was even more nervous about going to church pregnant and unmarried.  I told my parents and they were pretty supportive, upset of course, but supportive.  My mother and I did get into a few arguments and she said some things that really hurt my feelings, but I know she was just as upset about everything as I was.

So many people that I talked to acted like it was no problem at all.  “You can take care of it” or “just get it fixed” were common remarks and an abortion seemed to be a simple “solution” to the problem.  Even though my parents already knew I was pregnant it would be so easy for me to just tell them I had a miscarriage.  But I couldn’t do it.  I had never even considered having an abortion if I got in this situation and now that I was in it an abortion was certainly not an option for me.  I knew things would be hard and some people would think badly of me, but I had made the decision to have sex and this baby was not something I could just get rid of like it never existed.

Each month was difficult for me.  Often I felt like no one cared and that I was a loser and a screw up.  I kept wishing that things would go back to normal, but I knew that realistically this was my life.  I was going to be a single mom and I needed to prepare for it whether I wanted to or not.  During my pregnancy my relationship with the Lord actually improved.  I had been a Christian for several years, although I had made poor decisions on many occasions, but I felt like I was closer to the Lord than ever.  Even though I was in a bad situation I knew that everything would be ok and towards the end of my pregnancy I was actually happier than I had been in a long time.

Emerson Alexandria was born on Wednesday, June 17, 2009 at 9:54 am.  I couldn’t believe that this little bundle was actually my daughter.  It took a few months for me to realize that I was a mommy and the “unconditional love” didn’t set in for a couple months either.  I felt like something was wrong with me and that I wasn’t going to be a good mom.  After a while, however, I continued to fall more and more in love with my little girl.

Today I don’t know what I would do without her.  I love holding her in my arms and my favorite thing to do now is take naps with her lying on my tummy.  She has made me become a better person and has made me realize that I need to enjoy life and what I have and not take things for granted.  Although my situation is certainly not ideal and what God intended, I know that this happened for a reason.  I am so glad I made the decision to keep my baby and not “fix the problem” like I was encouraged to do.  Babies are not choices, they are a life.  We should not have the decision to terminate a life that God has created.  All people are “fearfully and wonderfully made,” and seeing how every person starts off as a baby, this applies to them also.  Emerson is the best thing that has ever happened to me and I know that every other baby can bring just as much joy as she has.

Celebrating Emerson’s First Birthday!


Welcome to Frugal and Simple

January 12, 2012 in frugal with 6 Comments

Welcome to Frugal and Simple, Money Saving Mom readers!!

I’m Rachel, a wife stay-at-home mom to two boys, Paxton who’s 21 months and Weston who is 3 weeks old! I blog about various aspects of living a simple and debt free life!

Some topics covered include:

Thanks for visiting Frugal and Simple!!

One Box of Clutter

January 10, 2012 in organization, simplify with 8 Comments

While organizing the nursery closet before Weston’s birth, I emptied out a small diaper box and decided to challenge myself to fill it up with clutter throughout the day!

While putting away clean dishes, I took a few extra minutes and went through the cabinets and drawers finding cookie cutters, baby spoons {we don’t need 10}, skewers and a creamer that’s never been used.

There were a few toys that Paxton never plays with that were added in and a shirt he doesn’t wear from the boys’ room.

I quickly went through my closet and dresser and I found a sweater, 2 shirts and a skirt that I don’t love and haven’t worn often.

And there were other odds and ends found throughout the house like a water bottle, a lanyard and some yarn.

I really didn’t put much time or effort into ‘de-cluttering’ but another box of stuff is leaving our home!

Living clutter free involves small steps. Start with one box, it won’t take much effort to fill up but you’ll feel great once you see that stuff leave your home!

Book Review: The Money Saving Mom’s Budget

January 5, 2012 in frugal, giveaway & reviews with 4 Comments

During the summer of 2008, I found Crystal Paine’s blog, Money Saving Mom. We were already living frugally since we had just gotten out of college but, like most college graduates, expected our standard of living to increase upon graduation. Thanks in part to Money Saving Mom, we were inspired to continue living on basically the same budget we had in college and start saving money for a house downpayment! Over the years that I’ve been a Money Saving Mom reader, I’ve been inspired by Crystal {she and her husband paid cash for their first home!}

I was excited to hear the news that she was writing a book and even more excited when the book came in the mail for me to review! I immediately started reading The Money Saving Mom’s Budget and finished it within a day.

This book is full of all kinds of practical information for getting your life in order. It begins with a chapter about goal setting which I found to be very inspiring. We already set financial goals for each year but haven’t really put much thought into long term goals. She poses the question, “where do I want to be financially five years from now?” This question prompted thinking more long term in regards to our finances.

The second chapter is devoted to clearing out clutter and streamlining your life. Practical strategies for getting rid of physical clutter as well as commitment clutter are mentioned. She poses questions to ask about your clutter such as “do I use this item regularly?” and “is this item taking up space I don’t have?”

As the title implies, budgeting is covered. The book outlines baby steps to take towards budgeting. She suggests during the first month  establish a grocery budget, the second month use bare-bones budget which covers basic necessities and by the third month you’ve worked your way up to a full-fledged budget. Taking these baby steps is a great way to not get overwhelmed with budgeting and give up!

One chapter is titled “Twenty-Five Ways to Lower Your Grocery Bill Without Clipping Coupons.” This chapter is full of money saving grocery tips such as have a meatless night once a week, stick with simple meals that use inexpensive ingredients and don’t throw out your leftovers. Just applying one or two of these suggestions could cut quite a bit from your grocery budget.

The final chapter is “Embrace Today” and Crystal writes about contentment, which I believe is a key to living a frugal life! You have the power to choose contentment, “a cheerful attitude can go a long way in less than ideal situations; you can either complain about the thorns or you can savor the roses that bloom in their midst.”  Ways to cultivate contentment are listed, including create a gratitude list, choose to stop comparing yourself to other people and choose to be  a giver.

There are helpful worksheets in the back covering financial goals, priorities lists, time budgets and budget sheets.

This really is a book that anyone  can benefit from. If you’re just starting out on a journey to get your finances in order, this book is full of valuable information that will help you! And even if you’ve been living a frugal and debt free life, there are things you can learn from saving on your grocery bill, being inspired to set lofty goals and focusing on contentment.

Pre-order The Money Saving Mom’s Budget.  The release date is January 10, 2012.

Disclosure: I received this book to review.  All opinions expressed are my own. 

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